My emotions about money, currently: "Venus is contra-parallel" = being abandoned by a beloved in the first 7 years of my life; can't bear being left behind one more time; can't bear that feeling...but I can now. Venus square pluto and contra-parallel, and square nodes...yuck. I've been living poor, partly because it addressed some emotional problems: 0. a temporary fix to the feeling that I've been abandoned by someone I love or am simply drawn to, which is not necessarily love; 1. running out of energy and then feeling I couldn't prove that I was out of energy and they wouldn't listen; anger at parents protestant-workaholic-ethics; 2. running out of food/resources = Kiron = stomach. Consequence: buying too much food or focusing on food as a remedy but still a distraction from the deeper, emotional truth. 3. as a reaction to others not seeming to really know what my individual situation is; feeling isolated; not wanting to feel like that child again...